Thoughts on what would happen if 20+ project managers tried to cook together.

  • Emad: http://dishcookingstudio.com/zf/public/site/ <-- this is where the offsite is starting
  • Jarita: oooh its fun. we went to something like that at my other job
  • Emad: oh yea?
  • Emad: 25 or so pm's
  • Emad: terrifying
  • Emad: 25 of us trying to delegate :D
  • Emad: ALRIGHT! WHO DID QA ON THIS????
  • Jarita: LOLOL
  • Jarita: I DID
  • Jarita: PASS
  • Jarita: PASS
  • Jarita: MEH
  • Jarita: PASS
  • Emad: It needs cinnamon
  • Emad: THAT'S NOT IN SCOPE!!
  • Emad: do you have budget for cinnamon?
  • Jarita: LOL
  • Emad: Can you chop the onions?
  • Emad: Sorry, I've been booked to grate cheese. Talk to the supervisor
  • Jarita: can you write up a spec of how to chop the onions
  • Emad: When do you need them by?
  • Emad: how many hours do I have for it?
  • Emad: 5 minutes? Genome only allows 15 minute blocks. I'll browse the internet for a bit. Kthxbye
Project Teams
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Project Teams

And on the topic of shit PMs say.  Here&#8217;s some shit Account Managers say&#8230;
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And on the topic of shit PMs say.  Here’s some shit Account Managers say…

Shit project managers say

And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy My PROJECTS! And you will know My name is the PM when I lay My vengeance upon thee!
I take each bug personally. Two weeks ago i had a dream that when i got into work there were 100+ issues assigned to me. Yes i had a dream about this.
Jarita

Source:

On time and on budget

  • jarira: have you ever worked on a project thats been done on time and on budget
  • eMad: not once. On time, yes.
  • jarira: on time sure
  • eMad: on budget - never happened at ML
  • jarira: is that just an accepted fact of life? Do google PMs run projects on budget? I dont understand why all PMs suck lol
  • eMad: on budget is almost mandatory here
  • jarira: ok well so was my last place, cause it was an external client so you can only push it so far cause the client wont pay
  • jarira: so what you've actually spent on resources vs what the client paid you
  • jarira: But why are projects always such a shit storm and never run properly ... like seriously... wtf
  • eMad: murphy's law, mothafuckaaaa!